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By Brian Pierce CREATED Jun. 21, 2011
TSWIFT dude.
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By Kellie Michaels CREATED Jun. 19, 2011
Manbabies right here!
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By Brian Pierce CREATED Jun. 15, 2011
Details right here!
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By Kellie Michaels CREATED Jun. 13, 2011
The finger exercise that eliminates all stress.
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By Kellie Michaels CREATED Jun. 9, 2011
Take me to Grasshopper Tacos.
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By Kellie Michaels CREATED Jun. 7, 2011
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By Kellie Michaels CREATED Jun. 6, 2011
The 25 dumbest wastes of money! Let's go!
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By Kellie Michaels CREATED Jun. 5, 2011
X Factor Online Sign-Up: CLICK HERE
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By Kellie Michaels CREATED Jun. 1, 2011
George W. Tickets here.
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By Kellie Michaels CREATED May. 31, 2011
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By Brian Pierce CREATED May. 25, 2011
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By Brian Pierce CREATED May. 24, 2011
Click here
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By Kellie Michaels CREATED May. 23, 2011
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By Kellie Michaels Archived Content
I bought them as gifts too. I copped out and gave gift cards as presents for Christmas. Not a lot - just enough to make me part of the problem. I don't recall when it started. People who track stuff like this, say the gift card phenomenon began about 5 years ago. We mindlessly marched to retailers and bought these dumb, dumb gifts. Is it a gift at all? Is it the best gift choice? No & no. Gift cards can never replace the actual "in your hand" gift. Gift cards are nothing but a promise of a gift - as soon as the recipient gets off their butt and goes shopping. This requires much more effort than just ripping off wrapping paper. You have to drive to the store, park, walk in, walk the aisles, make a decision, stand in the checkout lane, walk back to your car & drive home again. That's 8 steps in all - that could've been avoided if you had only selected a gift. Any gift at all would bypass the whole process. Best gift choice? Not by a long shot. Gift cards require you shop a particular store. Of all the shopping choices there are - you must make a trip to Big Earls Supply - because someone gave you a Big Earls Gift card. Does Big Earl have something you want? Maybe - maybe not. Maybe the gift giver loves Big Earls and you wouldn't be caught dead in the place.
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By Kellie Michaels Archived Content
I love potpourri. Let's leave it at that. I have it - some in bowls around the house. Potpourri gives your home a fresh holiday scent. I sense no argument from you. The story I'm about to tell should serve as warning. POTPOURRI WARNING. Consider placing your potpourri in objects other than shallow dishes. I'm talking about the potpourri that is small pine-cones, twigs, dried flowers, and small chips of wood. In a dimly lighted room, potpourri can be mistaken for a party snack. Ask my Dad, who while trying to chew a mouthful of potpourri asked, "What the hell is this"? He thought it was a little dry.
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By Kellie Michaels Archived Content
I like cardboard tubes. I always have. It's the best thing about wrapping presents - the left over cardboard tubes. They make great swords. It's fun to thwack your kids in the head with them. Most of all - it's fun to speak into them. Grab a tube and talk into it. That is quality fun. If you don't see the value of speaking into a cardboard tube, you haven't done it recently. The joy of the tube has been lost to you for too long. Try it. Advanced tube play includes - blowing up balloons and attaching them to the ends of a long tube. You can then pretend it's a barbell and you're the worlds strongest person. You can use them as binoculars in your make believe world. I keep my tubes nearby all Christmas season. Whenever I need to raise my spirits - or those around me - I break out the old dependable tubes. Enjoy your tubes, they've always been there - you were just too quick to call them trash. Sometimes it's the little things right under your nose that make all the difference, and there's nothing more fun than "thwacking" your kids with a tube
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By Brian Pierce Archived Content
I'm often asked, how do you keep up the good mood? I think about it often myself. How could a person who gets up at 4am, and is behind a microphone at 5 - in front of 80,000 people - maintain a good mood? Easy. I don't allow myself to get sick like you do. I maintain the grin with a cocktail of over the counter medicines, my favorite of which - has changed. Since the late 70's, I've been a Vicks Daycare man. In the last few years the name changed to DayQuil. I recommended it to anyone who asked. I swore by this stuff. I could have aches, pains, stuffy nose, headache, coughing - whatever - and DayQuil cleared it right up - at least enough to go on the air a few hours. My sick days over the last 15 years tell the story. I bet I've only missed 3 or 4 days - and those were because of toothaches & back pain. DayQuil. The answer to my prayers. I gave it to my kids too. They didn't miss school. BUT THE DAYQUIL RIDE IS OVER. The meth addicts have messed it all up. Vicks, in an effort to keep their medications in reach of the public, (not behind glass cases) have changed the active ingredient - the decongestant called pseudoephedrine has been replaced with an antihistamine called doxylamine succinate - which as far as I can tell - doesn't do a damn thing. I can no longer recommend DayQuil to anybody. The people who continue to ask, "How do you do it", likely will now be asking the person doing my show - because I will be home sick, without my magic pills, because the meth addicts screwed it up for everybody.
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By Kellie Michaels Archived Content
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By Kellie Michaels Archived Content
In 5 weeks my father turns 75 years old. He's losing his ability to order a hamburger. He admits this. The thought of never again being able to order a hamburger frightens him. He's not senile. He doesn't show signs of Alzheimers. At times, he's more lucid than me. Then why on Earth can't he seem to order a hamburger. He can - it's just becoming a more lengthy process. The problem is - it's almost impossible to get just a hamburger. There's a Big Mac, A Quarter Pounder, A Whopper, A Bacon Bacon Burger, A Jumbo Jack, A Cowboy Burger, The Doublestack, The Deluxe Doublestack, The Thickburger, The Monster Thickburger, The Big Mouth Burger - Jeez - I think you get the idea. My father wants a hamburger - so he orders a hamburger. The kid at the window or the counter then reminds him, "UUHH, We don't uh have a uh Hamburger. Do you mean an Old Roy?" "What's an Old Roy?" This is where the communication completely breaks down. My father wants a hamburger with tomato, lettuce, onion & mustard. No one sells it that way and he wants to know why. Sure, he could go to Burger King and "Have it his way" - but he'd freeze at the window trying to figure out if the Big King is the burger he's looking for. He panics - "Gimme an Old Roy." "Sir, we don't have an Old Roy - how about a Whopper?" "What comes on that?" "Mustard, Ketchup, mayonnaise, Lettuce, Onion, Pickle & Tomato!". "Well that's out of the question - it has mayo." "Would you like us to hold the mayo?" "Do you have anything that doesn't come with mayo in the first place?" "No sir." "Then give me a Deluxe Thickburger!" "Sir, we don't have a Deluxe Thickburger." - And it goes on and on and on. My fathers photo is displayed inside drive-ups and behind fast food counters all across Menard County Illinois. No doubt tonight he visited Dairy Queen and asked for an Old Roy. Would someone just fix this man a hamburger???? Who cares what he calls it - you know what he means.
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By Kellie Michaels Archived Content
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