How To Say It "Kansas" Style - The rest of the country just doesn't get it
Midwesterners say it our own way....and the west and east coasters just don't get it. Here are some midwestern expressions from the "flyover states":
1. "If I had my druthers…" What the heck is a "druther" anyway? "Druthers" is a shortened way of saying "would rather." So "If I had my druthers" essentially means "If I had my way." Usually when someone says this, they're amping up to tell you how something could have been done better.
2. "For cryin' out loud."
This expression of exasperation is reserved for when a situation or individual is particularly ridiculous or annoying. Instead of taking the Lord's name in vain and shouting "For Christ's sake!", it's much nicer to say "For cryin' out loud."
4. "That makes as much sense as government cheese."
For several decades the U.S. government handed out processed cheese to those on welfare, food stamps, or Social Security. The processed cheese was a mishmash of cheeses and emulsifiers that didn't taste (or smell) all that great. In short, people really hated it. So saying "That makes as much sense as government cheese" means something is a truly terrible idea.
5. "He got schnookered!"
If you've had one too many beers while out with friends and are excessively intoxicated in public, you're "schnookered." The term can also mean that you've been conned into doing something under a false pretense.
6. "Slow as molasses in January."
Have you ever seen molasses move during the dead of winter in Wisconsin?
8. "Tough titties"
Saying "Tough titties" is the equivalent of saying "Tough sh*t," but in a nicer way, of course.
People say it when they agree with someone, when someone else is right, or in lieu of "You're welcome."
10. "Dontcha know."
"Dontcha know" means "don't you know," but it's not a question — it's said as a statement.